You know the only thing that I don’t like about a professionally-administered massage? Having to get up and leave at the end of it. Wouldn’t it be nice if you could just be left in your limber, relaxed state to snooze for a few hours?

Evidently, this isn’t practical for the RMT or the spa. They’ve got to clear the table for the next customer to keep the dollars flowing in.

I pondered this question earlier this week when my employer paid for chair massages at our office. I arrived at a low-tech solution that borrows from hospital procedures.

Here it is: instead of getting on a massage table, you’d get on a massage gurney. When you’re all done, your blanket is pulled over you and you’re wheeled into a little private sleep room. To make this work properly, the sleep rooms would need two doors: an entrance from a private hallway, and an exit that people use when they wake up and are ready to leave. This keeps other customers from milling about you while you’re being wheeled out of your massage.

The key is minimal disturbance to the relaxing customer. The gurneys would need pneumatic tires so the ride is smooth and quiet. The private hallway and sleep rooms need to be kept at the same temperature as the massage room. The music would have to be piped in to all areas from a central source, with audiophile-grade equipment. All surfaces would need to be sound-insulated to some extent. Aromas would need to be consistent from room to room, and ventilation should be independent so folks can’t smell each other.

The exit door locks from the inside to ensure customer privacy and security, and the entrance door locks from the outside, to ensure customers go the right way when they leave. An “occupied” sign needs to be clear on the private hallway side. The décor in the room should be consistent with the spa’s theme, of course, but darkened, with warm, soothing hues.

Not being a spa owner myself, I figured I’d get the idea out there to see if it can be of use. Who knows? Maybe someone’s thought of it already.